Saturday, December 6, 2008

Watchful like a Kung Fu master (preferably of the panda variety)

Dear Aliens-Who-Are-Currently-Inhabiting-My-Body:

For starters, I'm onto you. As a follow up - you are doing a poor job of being subtle. What? Did you think just because you were making healthy choices for me, all of a sudden, I was going to turn a blind eye? Did you think I wouldn't notice? Aliens - you are new to this body, obviously, otherwise you would understand that changes this broad and rapid are not par for the course. Aliens - I am beginning to believe you didn't do your research too well.

I don't know what you are plotting, nefarious or otherwise, but if it involves going to the gym four times this week (two of those times involved waking up and going before work - Aliens, the real Meg would never do these things), taking my vitamins regularly, and flossing I am suspicious.

Know this, Aliens, for now I'm putting up with these changes and seeing where they take us, but the moment I find myself thinking "you know, I always did like lettuce more than chocolate cake, anyway" you will be out faster than you can say "low-budget Sci-Fi channel exorcism."

Yours,
Host Body.

In other news: Mary and I made a Wal-Mart run tonight which involved two key purchases. Key purchase one: The Last Holiday with Queen Latifah. Let's just say: we love Queen Latifah for a reason - and that reason now involves how hot LL Cool J is.

Key purchase two: a pair of fun reindeer antlers for Mary, which she wore on the way to the car. Why didn't she wear them all the way home? Because a guy in the parking lot said, I kid you not, "Hey baby - you can pull my sleigh...heh heh heh."

Ooooooh creepy dudes - do these approach tactics ever work for you?

1 comment:

Corelyn said...

This is what happens when you two don't have me around to forbid ridiculous dvd purchasing decisions. The Last Holiday? Seriously?

Had I been there, this purchase would never have been allowed. However, I am currently smiling to myself at the predictability of you and Mary's need to act on some of your RGI's ("really good ideas) even if only on the relatively small scale of what I assume was a $5 movie bin purchase.

You two are adorable in your conspiratorial nerdiness.