Since I spend my days with high schoolers and am now spending at least one evening a week with a pair of seventh graders, I think it is important that I have an opinion about pop music. That's right, my "Fall Out Boy" Pandora radio station is totally legit. I'm just trying to understand these kids, alright? YOU COULD NEVER UNDERSTAND MY PAIN LIKE THEY DO. Etc.
Thus I present to you my discoveries about pop culture, complete with youtube videos.
1. Every time I hear Britney Spears' new song, "Womanizer" I feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Seriously, I had no idea, but I am legitimately emotionally invested in how Britney is doing. I care. It makes me feel really good that she's got a New Hot Single out there, and that it's inhumanly catchy, and that I'm pretty sure from the first moment it hit the airwaves it was destined to be the anthem of really fabulous sorority girls and gay men everywhere.
2. HilDuff, on the other hand, does not please me quite so much. HilDuff, in fact, DISPLEASES me. Greatly. You may notice, if you choose to click this video that it is (1)really sadly trashy. In a sad way. A sad trashy way. (2) Basically a really weird cover of Depeche Mode's "Personal Jesus." Now, seriously, do you need to make almost anything by Depeche Mode wierder? Oh Hilary Duff - this is not edgy, it just makes me feel like one of those moms who needs to censor which teen queens her daughters want to emulate. Hilary Duff - I bought one of your songs off of iTunes, where's "Wake Up" Hilary?
3. I know you hate Beyonce, Cor, but I just don't. I like you, Beyonce, even though I suspect we would not be friends in real life. In fact, I suspect Beyonce of being TERRIFYING in real life, which makes me even happier that "If I Were A Boy" features, prominently, the subjunctive. The subjunctive may be in danger in the English language, but it's not dying on Beyonce's watch. Not today, evolution of the language towards a simplified vernacular, not today.
However, as much as I applaud Beyonce's semi-forward thinking, I also happened to stumble across the video for "Put A Ring On It" the other day. By "stumbled across" I mean "I watch a helluva lot of MTV, people, it's becoming an addiction." So anyway, first of all, the possible (anti?) feminist things going on here are interesting to me. Especially when taken along side "If I Were A Boy" and Beyonce's current proclivity for Black And White I kind of don't know how to make sense of either the sentiment or the aesthetic of "Single Ladies." Anyone feel like they're getting a little Josephine Baker/Exoticised other vibe?
...Maybe you can't tell, but I REALLY miss American Studies. Really, really.
I've run out of steam to write much more but I leave you with this, the video youtube just recommended for me. Youtube knows me well.
1 comment:
Several things need to be said here. I think I'll organize it with bullet points.
Womanizer
-I actually hate this song. I'm glad Britney's doing well finally, but this song is just awful in my opinion. Her voice sounds terrible, if you can even really call it a voice at all, and I find it more annoying than catchy
-OMG Britney should go redhead full time, it looks HAWT.
-Is it just me, or is the plot of this video something along the lines of bewildered-boy-gets-attacked-by-team-of-crazy-britneys-for-no-apparent-reason? I mean, I get that the title and lyrics of the song are supposed to clue us into the fact that he is apparently a cheating dog...but if you watch it without the music, it doesn't make any sense at all.
-I feel really uncomfortable seeing that much naked Britney...
Hilary Duff
-Yep. Trashy and just in general a bad song
-But I like that one outfit with the short shorts and the wife beater...
-Has anyone noticed that she looks exactly like a blond version of Nora from Nick & Nora's Infinite Playlist?
Beyonce
-See, I watched the video for "If I were a boy" because I like to give things a chance. If I didn't continually give Beyonce second, third, fourth, and fifth ad infinitum chances, then I couldn't legitimately hate her as passionately as I do. So you can see how I was surprised to discover that I actually kind of like this song and video. Not the style of music, so much, but the lyrics and message are actually interesting and do not appear to include the words "bootylicious" anywhere (to its immense credit)
-Then I watched the video for "single girl" and remembered EVERY reason why I hate Beyonce. This video hits them ALL.
1. Jerky, unattractive, completely graceless dancing makes up the entirety of the video. If you're gonna make a dance video, at least make it something I find visually pleasing.
2. Gratuitous crotch and booty shots
3. A broken-record-so-annoying-i-want-to-drive-into-something-just-to-make-it-stop chorus
4. The lyrics. These require no elaboration. You know what I'm talking about.
5. did I mention GRATUITOUS CROTCH SHOTS!!
So in the end, this Beyonce experiment changed my mind only in relation to this one song "If I were a boy" and I will continue to hold all other music by Beyonce in contempt.
And finally...
BABY Monkey!!!!!
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